Filed under: Confidence, Inspiration, Life, Mindful Living, Personal Connections, Simplify
In revisiting my simplicity reading, I’ve been inspired to suggest a movement. We’ve all heard the saying “keeping up with the Joneses” and we are all well aware of the trouble it has caused our society with unbelievable debt. My suggestion is a movement about “Keeping Up With The ‘OTHER’ Joneses.”
The Joneses I would like to compare notes with are the ones who believe in making deliberate choices and living a mindful life. Maybe this is what they “look” like:
- Making simple life choices in order to spend their money on what really means something to them.
- Having less debt because of their desire to live a life with a focus on personal connections with their loved ones rather than having to work as much as possible to try and keep ahead of their payments.
- The ones who move through life with confidence that they know exactly what they are working for and towards because they have spent the time with their own thoughts to figure it all out.
With our money woes playing such a large role in what our life ends up looking like, it is a basic starting point for simplifying our lives - to focus our energies on how we are spending our hard earned money. Anyone who is familiar with the idea of simplicity knows that it doesn’t mean depriving yourself of the things that you truly enjoy in life. Rather it means taking a very close look at what your goals are in this area of your life and making sure you are making it happen. You can say that one of your goals is to retire at the age of 55 however if you do not take the steps to make that happen, it won’t. Often times just wishing for something doesn’t make it happen …. there must be, at least, a little effort behind it.
I believe that if we each sat down and wrote down some basic thoughts about where we want life to take us and what we would like to achieve with the money we make throughout our lives, it will naturally make almost every other aspect of our lives more clear. I’m not suggesting that every person’s goal should be early retirement or even that their goal should be to live a debt-free life. What I am suggesting is that each person becomes aware of what their goals are and deliberately chooses what their life will look like. If nothing else, it will offer us peace of mind that what we are doing at the moment is perfectly aligned with our goals. Who doesn’t enjoy some peace of mind?
Filed under: Confidence, Gratitude, Inspiration, Life, Life Coach, Mindful Living, Simplify
It has been too long since I blogged. No excuses really, just caught up in our relocation to Nebraska and a little bit of laziness. With our relocation, I’ve had to consider what I am interested in doing as a career to help support my family. We were deliberate enough in our life changes that it is not an emergency for me to find just any old job. I have the luxury of being able to be just as deliberate about my career path.
As can be seen with my previous blogs, I have gone through training to be a life coach. I officially become a Certified Professional Coach as of tomorrow at 1 pm CST though I’ve been a coach for many years. This is one stream of income that I am passionate about pursuing and am working toward a game plan for that as we speak.
The other stream of income that I am passionate about has been “in me” since the 5th grade. In the 5th grade, I wrote a story about a farmer who had cows that gave orange juice rather than milk. While the story itself is not something that has stuck with me, the feeling it gave me to write it and the feedback I received has. Ever since then, I have dreamed of being a writer.
For the past few weeks I have been reading about becoming a freelance writer. I have signed up for various online discussion board groups about freelance writing. I have done all sorts of thinking and investigating around the topic however this morning it occurred to me …….. perhaps the real first step to becoming a writer is …….. TO START WRITING AGAIN!!!!!!!! Funny how the most obvious of answers can escape us for a period of time. And when we become more mindful of what we want and break it down into simpler, more manageable pieces it becomes crystal clear.
Here I am today in my first step of starting to write again. I am committed to blogging when the urge strikes me. I will begin journaling again. And when inspiration hits I’ll write about whatever is in my head at the time. There are many different avenues to share a person’s writing and I am beginning my discovery of what type of writing comes the most natural to me. I am grateful for this revelation and I know that the simple act of writing will build my confidence.
Filed under: Gratitude, Inspiration, Mindful Living, Personal Connections, Simplify
With this day and age of excess, I love the following list of ideas to teach our children how to simplify … just follow the link here.
http://www.onlineorganizing.com/NewslettersArticle.asp?newsletter=go&article=794
I have long encouraged people to give my children “experience” gifts rather than more things and it surprises me how difficult that seems to be for people. It is almost as if they don’t think it is a true gift unless there is something they can unwrap, play with for approximately 3 days and then discard in the tub with all the other things. Of course, there is the chance that a few months from now they will rediscover it and play with it for a few more days I love the idea of having the memories of fun times with people we love rather than another piece of plastic to eventually end up in a landfill.
My hope is that, with a little direction, the experience gifts are ones my children will request on their own as time goes on. I can picture them sitting and thinking about how much fun it will be to go to the “paint your own pottery” place with Aunt Angie and then reliving it each time they look at that clay spider they picked out. Sure it leaves them with bringing another “thing” home however this one has a personal connection tied to it. Personal connections make our lives much richer, fill us with gratitude and inspire us to keep others close to our hearts.
A woman who I have turned to many times to boost my inspiration is SARK. Check out her website at www.planetsark.com and you will find some really wonderful words and visuals. Her ideas are simple and fun and definitely outside of the box thinking.
Imagine a world where everyone recognized and appreciated the fact that we have a choice in our lives. We have the choice to be happy today or to be unhappy today. We have the choice to create actions toward what we want in our lives or stay in our comfortable place that doesn’t bring what we want into our lives. It happens with marriages, careers, lifestyles, friendships, etc., etc.
Here is to a movement of the power of personal choice and the empowerment that it offers each of us. I imagine it would create quite a happy place for all of us to live in. Being mindful of the life we are living each day.
Filed under: Confidence, Gratitude, Life, Life Coach, Mindful Living, Uncategorized
Hello! So the first of my 12 supervised coaching sessions happened this past Wednesday and I am happy to report that it is a delightful experience. It is a close-knit, safe and wonderful place to grow and develop our coaching skills and techniques. What better way to become for confident with my new chosen profession!
We coach someone in 6 of them and my first was this past week. It went well and, of course, received great feedback. Our group decided to coach each other so I will have the opportunity to be coached as well. An invaluable way to sort through issues that I need to become more clear on myself. The power of coaching is one that has to be experience to truly appreciate. I am so grateful to have it in my life. I am really looking forward to the rest of the sessions.
Filed under: Confidence, Life, Life Coach, Mindful Living, Simplify, Uncategorized
After completing the questionaire on www.strengthsfinder.com, I discovered that my “top 5 themes” are:
Maximizer: focuses on strengths as a way to stimulate personal and group excellence, seeks to transform something strong into something superb.
Connectedness: has faith in the links between all things, believes there are few coincidences and that almost every event has a reason.
Relator: enjoys close relationships with others, finds deep satisfaction in working hard with friends to achieve a goal.
Intellection: characterized by their intellectual activity, are introspective and appreciate intellectual discussions.
Input: has a craving to know more, often likes to collect and archive all kinds of information.
**All of these definitions come directly from the “Strengths Discovery & Action-Planning Guide” I was able to print off after taking the test. This document also describes how I, as a Maximizer, am different than other Maximizers based on my answers overall. It offers quotes from people in my themes, which tell me what these themes sound like. And it also provides some suggested action-plan items to consider in order to focus on these themes.
I really enjoyed the entire process. In reading the information listed for each theme I was not necessarily surprised with what it told me about myself however it was useful to see it all in one place for me. It made me feel as though my work in living a more mindful life has really been paying off in being more in tune with who I am, actually. It will be a really useful tool to reference back to if I am feeling some imbalance in life. It will allow me to reflect on whether or not one of my themes has been ignored lately.
Now I will be able to knowingly suggest this tool to my clients who need some guidance in reflecting on their own strengths. I guess that is just either my Intellection or Input theme showing up again!
It’s funny how difficult people find it to list their own talents, skills & strengths. As if being aware of what you are good at is something to be ashamed of. Is it a lack of confidence? Low self-esteem? I’ve seen this with the client focus form I use with my clients to prepare for their next coaching session, which asks them to list accomplishments toward their goal AND the skill/talent that it took to accomplish it. The purpose being to get them focusing on their strengths as a way of life – another step toward mindful living. It proves to be a challenge for many to answer this.
A tool I use with the clients who find it a challenge is simply writing a list of what their personal assets are – skills, talents, strengths. When this is difficult to start, I encourage them to either consider something they are proud of accomplishing and how they were able to do that or think about what others say are their personal assets. However it is important that they also write down some from their own thoughts.
When even this proves to be difficult, a really useful tool is to encourage them to buy “Strengths Finder 2.0″ by Tom Rath. There is an online questionaire that you complete and it tells you what your strengths are based on that – they refer to them as your “Top 5 Themes”. Not only that, it also tells you how you are different than other folks within your top themes AND offers you an action plan of how to work within those themes.
You do need to buy the book because there is a specific code in the book that you will need to access the questionaire. Also, the code is only good for 1 individual ….. so don’t buy it used unless you confirm that the code packet has not been cut open and/or the magic silvery stuff hasn’t been scratched off to reveal the code.
Filed under: Confidence, Gratitude, Life, Life Coach, Mindful Living, Simplify
Part III of “Change The Way You See Everything Through Asset-Based Thinking” by Kathryn D. Cramer, Ph.D and Hank Wasiak discusses methods to change the way you see situations. They point out the fact that when we have feelings of anxiety when presented with challenges, while normal initially, they are also very limiting. These feelings tend to hold us to a narrow perspective and keep us from recognizing all of the possibilities that come along with such experiences. Here are some of the ideas to open yourself up to the situation:
- “The Wider the Lens, the Better the View”: By staying open to every possible detail of a situation, you’ll have more options to work with. Your internal dialogue regarding challenges influences not only your personal perception, it also forms your interactions with others.
- Reframe your perspective of something being a threat (harmful) to a challenge (growth).
- Remember the power of focusing on slowing down your breathing. It calms you and will facilitate “Asset-based thinking”.
- “See the problem as a pause”: See it in slow motion and you will be able to get a better understanding of what is going on. Don’t get overwhelmed by the situation or problem, instead focus on the goal and keep moving toward it.
- Reverse the 80-20 rule by focusing “80% of your attention on opportunities and 20% correcting what’s wrong”.
- Create visions of what you want your life to look like. With this vision in mind, you’ll have a greater sense of purpose as you move toward having what you want.
- “Laws of Attraction”: Use your positive thoughts, actions and words to attract other like-minded people. This will make your “circle of influence” a fantastic resource to draw from in any situation. Surround yourself with people who inspire you.
When you are able to look at a situation with endless possibilities and as a way to grow, you can have whatever you want. Absolute freedom!
Filed under: Confidence, Gratitude, Life, Life Coach, Mindful Living, Simplify, Uncategorized
In taking a look at the next idea in “Change The Way You See Everything Through Asset-Based Thinking” by Kathryn D. Cramer, Ph.D and Hank Wasiak, you can change the way you see others. They include considering:
- “Use your positive filters, get more traction” where we get back into the mindset of looking at everyone we encounter as having something positive to offer, even through their negativity. We are all merely a work in progress. Acknowledging others “out loud and often” when they do something positive and remembering those things as your relationship grows over time.
- Looking at conflict as an opportunity to change your mind. Consider both sides of the issue as being true at the same time to eliminate any defensiveness and inspire curiosity. Working to create a truth that both sides can agree on.
- Recognize that each of us has behaviors that are less than desirable however we are still worth having a relationship with. Focus on the person’s strengths and what you like about them.
- “Tell the truth fast”: When approaching a conversation you think may be difficult, create a “healthier dialogue” by being clear and concise about what is bothering you; tell the person how it is affecting you and your relationship with that person; and, offer the “positive vision” you have for resolving it.
- When you look at a person, have your first thought be what you like about them. It can be anything from the dress they are wearing to the story a friend told you about their passion for rescuing dogs from bad situations. Have this be your thought before you even begin speaking with them.
- When you see a trait in someone that you admire, imitate it. “As a student of the assets of human nature, you are now ready to spot the best of what anyone has to offer.”
- Consider asking someone “How did you do that?” rather than “Why did you do that?” See the difference in tone ……
When we are able to look at others in a positive light from the get go and really open up to someone else’s thoughts on a particular issue, we open ourselves up to really growing as individuals. Challenging others to consider a different way of looking at someone is often met with resistance however it doesn’t mean we should give up!
